#79 Effective Listening Skills
Thursday, September 16th 2010 @ 1:59 PM
Of all the communications skills, listening is arguably the most important one and can make the biggest difference in any situation. Think about it, a brilliant and effective speaker achieves nothing if he fails to listen properly.
Believe it or not, listening does not come naturally to most people, so we need to roll up our sleves and work hard at it. The first test is to stop ourselves interrupting the speaker to give our opinions. You see, people don't listen, they just take turns to speak as we all tend to be more interested in what we say than really listening and understanding others.
We need to remember an important quote 'Seek first to understand, and then to be understood', which serves as a constant reminder for the need to listen to the other person before you can expect them to listen to you.
So what do we need to remember:
- listen carefully to the message given
- the words they have choosen
- the tone of voice
- other verbal aspects - e.g., pace, volume, breathlessness, flow, style, emphasis
- facial expression
- body language
- consider the cultural or ethnic background of the person as this could affect the way their communications and signals are affecting you
If you can, try and see and feel the situation from the other person's position. If you are not clear about the message given, always clarify your understanding.
Well good luck listeners and remember that God gave us two ears and one mouth for a good reason!!
James Bruce, NY
"The ear of the leader must ring with the voices of the people."
Woodrow Wilson
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"The most basic of all human needs is the need to understand and be understood. The best way to understand people is to listen to them."
Ralph Nichols
